The best and worst of the decade

Sooo, I'm back! I'm sure all 3 people who read my blog from time to time were concerned about my lack of posting. But never fear. I'm back. Breathe a sigh of relief.

In celebration of a new decade, I'd like to dedicate the following portion of this post to things that happened in the last decade that deserve some kudos and some boo hisses. I will call this section: Me likey and Not So Much.

Me Likey: graduating highschool, graduating college, getting a real job, getting married.
Not So Much: the thought of my highschool reunion, graduating to middle age soon, the stupid pointless paperwork that went with the real job, and my parents' divorce.

Me Likey: Amazing Race, America's Top Model, Project Runway
Not So Much: American Idol, Survivor, and The Swan-where you became as beautiful as you are on the inside, with the help of Botox and Plastic Surgery.

Me Likey: The Birth of my beautiful son
Not so Much: The birth of horrible celb-duo nicknames...TomKat, Bennifer, and Brangelina

Me Likey: The fact that kids will wait in line for a book premiere at a Barnes and Noble
Not So Much: Horrible movies from amazing children's books...Yes I am talking to you Disney, whom theme parks I love, but HATE what you have done to Bridge to Terebithia. Shameful.

Me Likey: Sesame Street celebrates it's 40th anniversary.
Not So Much: Einstein Baby does not make babies Einsteins at all. Instead it makes them piles of goo. This shouldnt really be shocking. Sitting your baby in front of the TV will not cause them to become geniuses! Whoops!

Me Likey: Finding out we are pregnant with a little girl.
Not so much: Finding out Jon Gosselin left his family for another girl.

Not me Monday

So back to "Not Me Monday." I've been slacking I know. Give me a break. I'm growing a baby.

Here we go...

I did not open the Halloween candy already. Like a month ago. And I also did not eat half the bag already.

(Speaking of Halloween, which was something I did not experience myself as a kid. My mom had strong feelings against this holiday, so my brother and I did not particiapte, much to my brother's dismay. I, however, was oblivious, but I do enjoy our church's alternative to Halloween, Noah's Arkade. The kids can dress up like a Bible character or an animal. My son is going as a cowboy. Which is neither a Bible character or an animal. But I'm pretty sure I saw Buzz Lightyear there last year so I think I'm in the clear. Last year he went as a penguin. Or possibly a nun. It was an interpretive costume.)

Anyway....on the cowboy note.

I didn't spend most the afternoon this past week making a pair of chaps. For Connor. Really.

I also did not poke myself 20 times with the needle before I seriously considered pulling out the hot glue gun to finish the project.

Switching topics....

Now that Connor is two, I felt the time has come for potty training. No one tells you how exhausting potty training is. Or maybe thats just me and every other mother in the world potty trains their child with little to no frustration and their children run with giddy excitement to the potty. ....ugh I hope not.

So...I certainly did not put our potty training on hold for a while which will resume at an undetermined time because I was simply tired of training. I did not spend an entire week indoors, with a diaperless child chasing him around the house constantly asking, "Do you need to potty? Do you need to potty?" To which he would reply "NO Mommy!!!" and run away from me. And I do not secretly feel happy about holding off on potty training for another month or so.My son is a smart cookie. I think he holds all his potty needs until it is nap time when he has his diaper on and then its like Niagra Falls has been released.

So until then our Elmo potty seat will have to wait to be seated upon. And our Frog Potty chair (portable baby potty) will just have to continue to be a fashionable plastic blue hat for Connor until he is ready for its intended use.

Well, I'm off to go finish a cowboy vest. Connor's of course. Not mine. Really.

An interview with my unborn child...

Q. What is your favorite food you like your mommy to eat?
Baby: Nothing....I much perfer Mommy to have an empty stomache. Makes more room for me. It is after all, all about me!

Q. So then I guess the food you like least is.....
Baby: Yeah...everything. Food is gross.

Q. Don't you feel bad about making your mommy sick every morning?
Baby: She's a strong lady. She can handle it. Besides, who wants to digest food anyway right?

Q. So what do you think you are going as for Halloween?
Baby: A case of indigestion.

Q. Hmmm interesting. So is there any indication when the morning sickness will come to an end?
Baby: Well they always say the end of the first trimester which is in 2 weeks. Holidays are coming up soon. I might just let mommy enjoy Christmas Cookies. Of course that could just be a campaign promise as well. Time will tell.

Oh baby!

So I think most everyone knows...well everyone who are in our circles. It's quite possible the weird neighbors we dont talk to dont know....and the guy who bags our groceries at Publix doesnt know....but for everybody else....you know by now...we're pregnant!!!

We are technically due May 2...but the doctor told us it's another C-section for us this go around at 39 weeks so looks like it will be a late April baby. Late April seems to be a good month for Elkins' babies. Sean's brother and cousin were both born on the 28th of April.

You may be wondering...wow...C-section. Scary?
No not so much. I personally think God understands my fear of throwing up during labored delivery or my guess that I would probably pass out. One of the two. So C-section was the best option.

Of course....it's not like I asked the doctor or God for a c-section. Going under a knife and having surgery was definitely not my plan when we had Connor. In fact when they told me he would be a C-section delivery because of how big he was measuring, I cried for two days. I had not prepared myself for this option....not that I really prepared myself for a laboring delivery either though. (hangs head and covers eyes) We didnt take the labor and delivery classes. I know. Stupid. What were we thinking? I think I just didnt want to face the video where they show a women going through delivery. I could see me now...."No...no thanks...I dont think I'm going to do that."


So to answer any other questions you may have at this time:

1. How are you feeling?
I am in a constant state of nausea. Morning till night. Gingerale is my new best friend.

2. Craving anything yet?
The mere sight of food or a smell...can send me shaking my head violently and closing my eyes in disgust. My biggest shock this past week...I made chocolate eclair pie for a family gathering. This by far is my most favorite dessert and I never turn it down. (Ive been known to lick my plate...dont judge me) and while making it...the sight of chocolate frosting grossed me out. siiiighh I didnt even taste it. What a waste of good pie.

3. Do you know if its a boy or girl yet?
No right now this little one is like a little blobby with arms and legs lol. We will find out around 20 weeks...I am only about 9 weeks now.

4. Are you going to get the swine flu vaccine recommended for pregnant women?
I am wrestling with this one. Do I want swine flu? No of course not. Then again do I want to take something that has had no testing on pregnant women with no idea what it could do to my unborn child and inject it into my body? Not so much.

5. How is Connor adjusting to the idea of being a big brother?
So far so good...he's only 2 and doesnt comprehend this idea too much yet. He does know there will be a baby in the family... "Momma, Daddy, Me,.....baby." He gives the baby kisses (my tummy). He also claims I have 20 babies in my tummy. (Thankfully that is untrue) and according to him, I am the baby's "house." (Which has some truth I guess. Not that I love being referred to as a "house.")

On our way to TWO...continued

Mommy life lesson number 2...... laugh at the little stuff.

I think my mommy attitude when it comes to stuff like this is, if it isnt really that big a deal....then why make it a big deal?

Yes this was an entire container of brand new puffies. Yes they cost me $2.50 at Publix. Yes I had crumbies all over my floor. Yes he did eat some off the floor. Yes he probably ate some cat hair when he ate the puffies of the floor. Yes the thought of my toddler eating cat hair kinda grosses me out.

But then I thought...what a great photo opportunity.

On our way to TWO

My son is turning two this weekend and I cant believe it. Pretty soon he'll be driving my car, bringing home girls I dont like.....sigghhh I dont even want to think about that. In the mean time, I'll stick with two and all the grape jelly messes and goofy toothy grins that come with it.

So in honor of my son each day this week I am going to post things my son has taught me about motherhood and how he has shaped me into being a mom. Ive been a mom for two years now. Amazing right?

1. Toddlers can never have too many books. I think my son's vocabulary has grown leaps and bounds just from the books we read to him everyday. Everyday you ask? Yes everyday. Sunday, Monday, Tuesdays and all the rest of the week. Why everyday? Because for one, he loves to read (as you can tell from the above picture.) and because reading to your kids is perhaps setting the most important thing you can do in order to instill a love of reading for themselves later in life. So parents, take a few minutes, grab Dr. Seuss off the shelf (Connor recommends Dr. Seuss' ABC book) and read with your kids!

Cue piano music and "The More You Know" slogan....

I love me some Sesame Street

So as promised...

Sesame Street is fast becoming one of my favorite shows. I believe it has replaced my Jon and Kate plus 8 obsession. Why you ask?

1. On Sesame Street, I dont have to deal with the awkwardness of the absence of Jon.

2. On Sesame Street, I dont have to deal with the awkwardness of Jon's weird hip hop clothes and diamond stud earrings.

3. Sesame Street is funnier than Kate hitting Emeril with a spoon and a lot funnier than Aiden (the one with the glasses) claiming he "can't see sheep."

4. Plus Sesame Street is educational, although I have learned from j&k+8 to make an organic environmentally friendly household cleaner from baking soda and vinegar. Thanks Kate!

Okay so I truly think Sesame Street is a lot funnier than when I was a kid. Minus the Elmo portion of the show. Elmo is NOT funny. He is the least funniest character of the entire show. Nothing is funny about a monster that refers to himself in the 3rd person. However I do enjoy the part in Elmo's World when Elmo asks advice in a portion he calls, "Now Elmo will ask a baby." Those are some funny babies.

But do you want to know the real star of the Sesame Street? Prairie Dawn!

Prairie Dawn. ...you know the little blonde muppet person.

Blue dress. Plays piano.

No?

<----Remember now?

Prairie is the character that gets the joke before all the characters. She's easily annoyed and often is the "lesson teacher" for the characters. She is often paired with Cookie Monster and is determined to teach Cookie Monster the value of not gobbling cookies up so fast and sharing his cookies with others. (....we all have our faults I guess) I guess why I love Prairie Dawn is because she's the only character in the show that "gets it." Prarie often sighs in annoyance when Big Bird sings "which one of these things is not like the other? Which one of these things just doesnt belong?.....The pineapple, the banana, the apple, or Snuffy Snuffleupagus? Prairie Dawn seems to be in on the joke and cannot believe the rest of them are truly trying to figure out the differences between fruit and a giant imaginary elephant/mastedon. C'mon Big Bird! Praire gets it!

I find myself laughing more than my son (he's just in it for the ABC's anyway) at Bert's fascination with oatmeal (www. youtube.com/watch?v=bQ3eiaK6LAU) or when Ernie decides he will fill in for The Count, dons a cape and walks around yelling "Thunder! Lightning! Ha-Ha-Ha" Were they this funny when we were kids?