Birthin Babies

Remember my "teeth sucker" post?


www.applesauceisthenewblack.blogspot.com/2010/12/mommy-wars.html


Here's a warning....don't be a teeth sucker while reading this post.


Here's another warning..there will be pictures of birthing in this post...but nothing that will make you blush. So if you are uncomfortable with that...you are probably a 10 year old boy....I jest I jest...

I'd like to talk about something that really bothers me. It goes along with my mommy wars post (see above link). "Superiority birthing." Thats what I'm calling it. Thats not a true term by anymeans...but I think it fits the notion of what I'm talking about.


The idea that one way of birthing is more honorable, more "work", more true, more noble, more right, less self serving, less invasive,... less...or more of someone else's experience.


I've got a severe problem with that. If you feel that you have had a more superior birth than others and are offended by my "naiveness"...then I'm sorry if you feel like you need to "unfriend" me on facebook. I'll carry on, although I just don't know how you will carry on with your help with Farmville without me. *tear



I'll start here...

I am a 2 time c-section mom. And I wouldn't have had it any other way.















(Eeks! Blood!.....It's ok...just breathe)




Connor was a scheduled c-section. And when I say "scheduled" I mean: The doctor said my baby was huge and he was afraid I would labor and tire myself out and end up with a c-section anway....so they scheduled me for a c-section.


I didnt have months to get used to this idea...I had 2 weeks. And in those two weeks I did a lot of praying and crying....mainly because I am the world's biggest chicken when it comes to pain. I already was a little freaked out by the idea of a vaginal birth. (Did she just say "vaginal??" Yes.... yes I did. Let's continue...). But now we are talking surgery. Surgery people! Whith scalpels and everything!

And then came out Connor...all 9.12 lbs of him. My mom said she over heard a couple speaking in Spanish at the nursery window, pointing at Connor, saying he looked like he ate one of the other babies. Every nurse who came into my room, would look at Connor, then at me, and then back at Connor and then would say, "You DID have a C-section right?"

So let's pause for a moment, for any teeth suckers, who may be saying...yeah but you could have still birthed that 9lb 12 oz butterball! It's possible.


Yes...it may have been possible. I may have labored for 30 plus hours, done some damage to myself birthing him, he may have had to be pulled out with forceps. Or you never know...maybe almost 10 pound babies, just. POP right out. Could happen.










But when I look back at my birthing experience with my son (yes I do feel like a C-section is still "giving birth.")








And my birth experience with my daughter....








And I honestly feel, like I gave birth the right way...for me. I do not feel cheated in any way. I feel like I battled through my surgery to have my babies, just like another mommy would battle her way through labor for her own baby. I think C-sections have a nasty stigma that go along with them. I was not FORCED into a c-section. My C-section was not the "easy way" out of giving birth. (Believe me, there is nothing easy about surgery that makes it difficult to get up and walk, and to take care of a newborn at the same time). I did not choose a C-section for my body's appearance sake...because C-sections do not magically leave your tummys all flat and smooth. again. Who has two thumbs and could totally use a tummy tuck? This girl. And when the medical community figures out how to make that happen with the use of a pill that magically tightens up your skin, I'll be first in line!


I do want to say that I do sympathize with the mommies who may have C-sections thrust upon them in an emergency situation or that they are so tired that they simply cannot go on laboring. I had 2 weeks to get used to my upcoming c-section. The idea of surgery...any surgery...can be scary and when you have planned on delivering your baby in a certain fashion, I can definitely understand a disappointment. A good friend of mine had this happen to her, and from what she has shared with me, it was a difficult experience. She is now due with baby number two, with a repeat C-section delivery in a few weeks! And I pray her experience will be much easier! :)


On the opposite end of C-sections....I'd like to share with you the birth of Samuel...


not a C-section birth...but a birth spent in many hours of labor,(26 hours, I'm told) joyfully endured by a friend of mine, Tara.



Natural and drug free at a Birthing Center and assisted by a midwife and doula!!! (That man in the picture is not the midwife or the doula by the way, that's Angel, Tara's hubby)










Samuel's appearance into the world was long anticiapted and he truly is the answer to prayer for his mommy and daddy.

Being a C-section mommy, I can also appreciate the beauty and the joy of a birth, like Samuel's that was so lovingly and thoughtfully planned. It was important to Tara to have her birth experience not take place in a hospital. And from what I understand...her experience was extremely positive at their birthing center.


Many would raise an eyebrow with the idea of not having a baby in a hospital, but Tara and her husband had to think what birth experience was right for them. And looking at her pictures, and hearing her talk about her experience of delivery, it is so evident that they made a wise decision in this area.


I hope, especially us moms out there, remember this important point when it comes to the birth choice of your friends....


-Do not express you "don't like" or could "never think of" having a baby in a certain fashion...especialy if the person you are talking to, has had a baby in that fashion. Because what you are really saying is that "I don't approve of your birth choice."....just cause you say it with a smile or a look of "concerned shock." Doesn't make it any better.


All of us moms....have gone through some kind of battle to give birth to our babies, whether it was with drugs or natural, with a c-section or a v-bac.....it was all "labor."



Did you see that?....the use of irony?....with the word "labor?"....I know....hilarious right?



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You people are no fun.















Sigh......